This was our first Christmas without family or close friends near-by, so to get in the holiday spirit, Joe and I decided to buy tickets to a production of A Christmas Carol at the local theatre. It turned out to be an experience full of surprises!

We had the tickets several weeks in advance and were actually really looking forward seeing our first play in German. As an early Christmas gift, Joe gave me the Robert Zemeckis version of Eine Weihnachts Geschichte on DVD and we watched it in English (with German subtitles) as a refresher. I played Ebenezer Scrooge in the 6th grade Holiday Play, so I needed little to trigger my memory of the story’s details! (To be honest, I had to write most of my lines 25 times each because I kept messing them up. I can still recite several of them today. However, the demise of my acting career is a tale for another time.)

Surprise #1 – The day before the production, a friend told Joe that it would be presented in English. Oh, really?! We were disappointed, but more so confused about how this critical piece of information went un-noticed.

Surprise #2 – We decided to go to the Christmas market before the show started and have dinner there. The theater was on the same street as the market, so we stopped by to confirm what time the doors opened. The poster on the window advertised, “A Christmas Carol – Brian Barnes, One Man Theatre”. Oh, really? This detail must have been lost in translation. For the entirety of dinner, we contemplated how it would be possible to reenact the story with only one person. Joe’s hypothesis: holograms. Mine: smoke and mirrors.

We got into the theater and found a seat. The stage contained only 5 items: a desk, a chair, a coat rack, a sleeping jacket, and a night cap. Ok, a prop-less, back drop-less, one man theatre it is! Then a weird phone started ringing. Not someone’s cell phone, but an old-school real phone, from somewhere within the theater. Joe leans in for his best Brian Barnes impression, “I’m sorry, its Brian. I’m sick. The show is cancelled.” The phone rings again a few minutes later. Me, “Hi, its Brian. I really am hung over. Do I have an under-study?” It rings a third time, some minutes later. “Perhaps someone in the audience can do the show. You really only need just one.”

So it begins. One man who is at least 70 years old, five props, and two native English speakers at the English presentation of A Christmas Carol. Here comes surprise #3 – all the Germans, for whom English is a second language don’t forget, are laughing at jokes…in English…that I don’t get! Oh, really? What is going on here?!

We sit for an hour and a half straight, fixated on one man telling the story of one Christmas Eve in London. It was amazing. He was a true story-teller, with no pomp and circumstance needed to weave a tale of fear, enlightenment, and redemption. A reminder of the forgotten entertainment of yesteryear.

After thunderous applause from the audience of 50ish, he uttered the only three German words of the evening, “Would you like eine kleine Zugabe?” (a small encore?)

As we walked home I pondered the last surprising realization for the evening (#4): How can a 70+ year old man remember a 90+ minute monologue, while I struggle to remember 5- vocabulary words in German from one day to the next?

God bless us, everyone!

Oh Tannenbaum, Oh Tannenbaum, how lovely are your branches?

You would think, in the land of Christmas Trees, at the foot of the Black Forest, that we would have a Weihnachtsbaum fit for a holiday card. Well, I am going to hope that all the beautiful trees are still standing, cleaning the Earth, and providing visual pleasure for countless years to come. I say thins because it seems that only the scraggly and unsightly trees are available for gracing the homes of Freiburgers.

History first: In the 16^th century, German Christians brought decorated trees into their homes and are accredited with starting the Christmas tree tradition. It is rumored that Martin Luther, the 16^th century Protestant reformer, first added candles to a tree. In the 1830s German settlers in Pennsylvania were the first ones to bring the Christmas tradition to America. Christmas tree ornaments were shipped from Germany in the 1890s, at a time when Christmas trees and ornaments were seen as pagan symbols by Americans. You’d think all these years of practice would yield some really great Christmas trees!

Reality next: Our Weihnachtsbaum is far from post-card quality. The first challenge was where to buy one. I asked my German teacher and she had no idea. We went to the Rathaus (Town Hall) and they were of little help. We ended up at the German version of Home Depot, which had about 3 parking spaces worth of selection. Every tree had at least two feet of branch-less trunk at the top and the rest was so sparse you could see through to the other side. After looking at four or five different trees, the man pulls one out and says, “DAS ist ein Tannenbaum!” (THAT is a fir tree!) He was pretty pumped about it. So I said, “Dann, das ist UNSER Tannenbaum!” (Then, that is OUR fir tree!) We loaded it into the trunk of our sedan, drove home, put it in the elevator, and then got to work!

Hanging the lights was an interesting task. I pretty much created a tangled mess of wires and lights where branches should be. I told Joe he had to take them all off in January. Poor kid.

The top of the trunk was about four inches too long to accommodate the star. I didn’t feel like trying to cut it with scissors, so I just folded it over. I expected it to snap and break, but no, it was just like folding a Twizzlers. Hmmm…that’s a new one.

The ornaments had to go through several screening processes since we were limited on space. To all those who didn’t make the cut: Sorry, try again next year.

The tree has been standing for several weeks now, thank goodness. We chose not to buy European Christmas lights, so we have the strands plugged into a transformer. It is always a surprise what the lights will look like when they are plugged in. Some strands go on, others don’t. Some turn off when they get too “tired”. Sometimes the entire tree just goes dark. We don’t ever leave the tree unattended, as it surely is a fire-hazard.

To top it all off, we get to keep the tree until January 18^th! That is the only day that tree-pick up occurs on our street. Regardless of its idiosyncrasies, at its resemblance to Charlie Brown’s tree, it is our German Christmas tree and it makes us laugh.

Oh Tannenbaum, Oh Tannenbaum, your branches green delight us.